Fat Girl,

Introspection on depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and life.

November 9, 2012 0 Comments

What’s so wrong with atten­tion? Does my wast­ing body not tell you about my wast­ing soul? Do the scars on my arms and legs not tell you about the scars on my soul? For the girl with the words, the girl who was going to write books some day, I nev­er ever had the words for the pain. And I still don’t, even though I’ve long left the starv­ing and cut­ting.

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Fighting the sadness.

October 31, 2012 18 Comments

Depres­sion says noth­ing about our moral­i­ty, our worth as peo­ple, or our stand­ing before or rela­tion­ship with God. I call these cop­ing mech­a­nisms because that’s what they are for me. They help me get through my days when I oth­er­wise might not be able to.

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A strong legacy.

May 29, 2012 0 Comments

Mom,

You know how you always say that a let­ter is bet­ter than a gift, because it’s some­thing you can read over and over again through the years? Well, I thought that maybe I’d make my let­ter to you pub­lic, so oth­er peo­ple can enjoy how awe­some you are, too.

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On positive feedback.

May 29, 2012 0 Comments

When I received an email from one of their staff offer­ing assis­tance to me at the end of my tri­al, I couldn’t just delete it as I nor­mal­ly would. I took the time to thank their staff mem­ber for reach­ing out to me and to let him know that my needs were being met with the free option but I loved the ser­vice enough to pay when the time comes.

Why did I do that? I could have just let the email pass. I’m busy, they’re busy — is it even prof­itable to take up someone’s time when I’m not ready to close a deal?

I think so.

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The proper response.

December 8, 2011 12 Comments

Trig­ger warn­ing: sex­u­al assault, rape.

When some­one tells you that they have been sex­u­al­ly assault­ed, harassed, molest­ed, raped, or any­thing of the sort, the prop­er response is to say, “I’m so sor­ry. It wasn’t your fault. What hap­pened to you was rep­re­hen­si­ble, and no one should be forced to go through that. What can I do to be there for you? Do you want to report it to the police? I will be with you every step of the way, no mat­ter what you do. You’re not alone.”

If you have any doubts about whether or not they are telling the truth, the prop­er response is still the same as the above. Do not voice your lack of con­cern. Do not voice or oth­er­wise show your increduli­ty. Be noth­ing short of sup­port­ive.

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Taking action in response to genius.

April 26, 2011 0 Comments

I’ve heard it said that there are two types of genius­es: the type whose work makes some­one feel that they’ll nev­er mea­sure up, and the type whose work makes some­one feel inspired to do bet­ter work.

But real­ly, doesn’t that say more about the observ­er than it does about the genius?

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The Last Air-Bender Win and Fail.

March 22, 2011 0 Comments

As a series: unfail­ing­ly win (though grant­ed­ly annoy­ing at times, most­ly because I can’t stand male ego and super angst dis­played in some of the char­ac­ters).

As a movie by M. Night Shya­malan: unfailingly…well, fail.

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Hershel.

January 8, 2011 0 Comments

My grand­fa­ther passed away this morn­ing. He died in his reclin­er, cof­fee cup beside him, half-emp­ty pack­et of tobac­co stick­ing out of his pock­et (with a wad in his mouth), watch­ing the WVU pre-game. Heart attack — his fourth one, though first in over a decade. He was 78 years old.

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Killing trees and getting personal.

December 2, 2010 0 Comments

I am a tac­tile per­son. I like to feel the paper, I like to inter­act with it. I like to draw on it and imme­di­ate­ly draw con­nec­tions in my mind. I retain what I’ve read much bet­ter away from the screen when my inter­ac­tion with it is phys­i­cal and imme­di­ate. I feel far removed from my work on the com­put­er. I feel deeply con­nect­ed to what I actu­al­ly touch.

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The importance of education.

October 22, 2010 0 Comments

The only design edu­ca­tion that is of any impor­tance is the edu­ca­tion you give your­self — the edu­ca­tion that you demand and steal wher­ev­er you can, when­ev­er you can, as much as you can, as long as you can.

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