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Fat Girl,

Never.

January 15, 2018
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Consideration — For the Well-Meaning Christian

October 18, 2017

I’ve said over and over again in this series: I know you mean well. But you have got to think about your words. Think about what you’re saying when you say, “It’s only through the grace of God that I’m healing.” Think about the implications of your words to people who aren’t like you. Think about how what brings you comfort has been used as a baseball bat against others.

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Pro-Choice and Proud

June 23, 2017

Normalize and support a person’s right to choose.

Everyone deserves basic reproductive health, and for people with uteruses, that health is impossible without the right to choose.

Don’t just support places like Planned Parenthood Action (but please do!! especially your local clinics!!). Support the people in your life who need that support.

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The Process of Being.

April 16, 2017

This Saturday, April 22, I will turn 30 years old. (Want to help me celebrate?)

Frankly, this terrifies me.

All my life, I never envisioned myself living past the age of 28. I figured that either the rapture would have occurred, or I would have killed myself. So you’d think 29 would have been my all-out panic year, but I spent 29 dealing with a lot of other things.

Now, with 30 at my doorstep, I’m caught in its headlights, awaiting its impact with an ever-increasing sense of dread.

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Haikus with Dani: Coercion

March 17, 2017

Content note: rape

St. Patrick’s Day will never be the same for me. This whole week has been nothing but hellish memory almost every waking moment. I’m so grateful for the friends and family who have spent time with me to make sure I’m not alone and that I’m safe.

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Haikus With Dani: overwhelmed; overwhelming.

February 28, 2017

Brought to you by intense introspection during a season of traumatic anniversaries. I’ve been thinking a lot about how to describe my mental health struggles, and I think I touched on a couple of things pretty well here.

i do not mean to
overwhelm you. i simply
overwhelm myself.

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Haikus with Dani: In Which There Is No Room.

January 26, 2017

It’s been a full year since I broke up with my spouse. A very hard year, if you recall. I’ve spent a lot of time trying to process things as best as I can, and that often looks like distilling emotions into haikus. Something about the structure and limitation seems to lend itself well to expressing myself in succinct and powerful ways (much like how Twitter’s character limit can help focus one’s thoughts).

I don’t really want to offer commentary on this. There is so much I am still processing. But it feels important to share it, and to share it now. And one of my goals is to listen to my intuition far more than I’ve been able to in the past.

One thing I will say is this: it’s a terrifying time in our country right now. To be a woman, not white, not straight, not healthy in body and mind. Most of my friend group — myself included — are fighting the creeping despair as we watch this new administration work so hard to make our lives at best uncomfortable and at worst nonexistent. It’s easy to not take care of yourself in an effort to remain informed, to know what fresh hell awaits every morning.

But the little things matter. Little things like remembering to eat. Checking in with friends. Asking people to check in on you. Kissing your loved ones. Snuggling your pets. Or even daring to simply take up space.

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As dumpster fires go.

December 31, 2016
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Cognitive distortion and taking up space.

November 3, 2016
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Intersectionality or Bullshit: When White Feminists Profit From Women of Color

August 12, 2016
A mix of roman caps, italic, and uncial calligraphy of Flavia Dzodan's quote, "My feminism will be intersectional or it will be bullshit."

I don’t deserve cookies or kudos for how I’ve handled interest in this design, for being primarily concerned with Flavia’s ownership of her words and desiring that she receive compensation for her work rather than me. This is bare minimum decent human behavior.

Especially for feminists who claim to be intersectional when their actions prove, when it comes to intersectionality, their feminism is indeed bullshit.

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